Parenting happens best on a Thursday: Tip #4

Here we go again.

Tip #4  Work hard to create good memories.

Now, this one may seem like common sense, but I tell you.  Make this a conscious priority.  We plan special trips.  We create family traditions. Lisa decorates the house for different seasons and holidays.  We try to have them all experience new and different things.  Lisa and I have always worked hard to try and give the kids good memories of their childhood.  When it's all said and done, I really hope that they can all look back  and say that this was true.   Here is a teeny-tiny, itsy bitsy glimpse into some of my favorite family memories over the years (and I am excluding Disney shots).

Be intentional with your family.

 

Parenting happens best on a Thursday: Tip #3

I'm a little late posting a parenting tip tonight as I spent the day, well,  parenting.  I was a Watchdog at Echo Lake Elementary School today.  If you are not familiar with WATCH D.O.G.S., check out the link.  It is a great program I have been participating in at my kids' school for several years.  There are currently ZERO men teachers at the school and this program attempts to have at least one man (dad, uncle, grandpa, etc.) at the school every day, and I believe Echo Lake has succeeded this year to date.  It is great to have a male influence there in the kids' lives.

I helped kids get out of their car as they arrived, went to PE, helped draw turtles in Art, was a lunch monitor for kindergarteners, got to work the Promethean board for a word game, saw Nicholas and Patrick practice for a play, files books at the library and had a ball high-fiving kids as they walked by and yelled "Hey Watchdog!"   Fathers, get involved!   Wow that could have been the tip of the day right there.  But, on to something else....

Tip #3:  Have dinner as a family, as often as you can, as long as you can.

I know lives get busy, but try to do this every day.  We have always made a point of doing dinner together.  It is a time for us to hear about everyone's day and just spend some time together.  I believe quantity time together is just as important as quality time together.  And there is food involved.  Nothing can go wrong with that!

Here are some random shots of the Wrights eating together.

 

 

Parenting happens best on a Thursday: Tip #2

I understand you parents have been counting down the days until Thursday to read this new parenting tip.  Well, the anticipation is over.  Thursday is here, all day long.  Have a Happy St. Patrick's Day.  If you are not wearing green right now, consider yourself pinched.  And a bit of St. Patty's Day trivia, pinching someone who is not wearing green is apparently only an American thing.  If you pinch someone in Ireland today, you'll probably get punched.  Take heed my warning. 

Now on to the main event.

Tip #2:  Sit together as a family in church.




Hmmm. That doesn't seem like much. And those of you who do not attend church are probably thinking you can mark this one off your list. But pay close attention (and get to church people!!!).

This has always been huge in the Wright household!!!! We have had our kids sit with us through the entire church service ever since they were teeny, tiny toddlers. We are not big fans of children's church.  We've always encouraged (please translate that to the appropriate word "made") our kids sit with us in church.  I think it does several things:

1.    Trains kids how to sit in church.   It is really only an hour or so.   A young child should be able to do this.  Period.   Sure, when they are really young, bring paper and crayons or whatever to help pass the time, but a kid needs to learn to sit quietly in a worship service without causing interruptions.

2.    Trains kids how to behave appropriately in church.  I watch some teenagers text or play games on their phones during the church service and I want to stand up, walk over and slap them on the back on the head.  Should you ever see any of my kids doing this, you have my permission now to do exactly that to them.  And then, when they appropriately turn the other cheek, slap that as well.  Children should act with respect in church, to those up front speaking or leading worship and more importantly with respect to God.

3.    Trains kids to listen to a pastor.    Sure they may not understand everything when they are age three, but they should get some of it.  And get more of it the older they get.   Always ask your kids what they heard or learned in church every week on the way home from church or over Sunday lunch.

4.    Shows kids that families do important things together.  Like worship.

5.    Allows us to worship together as a family.  I want my children to grow up worshipping God with me.  I want that memory to be burned into their minds.  And I want them to decide one day that they want their kids to worship with them as well.

This past Winter (yeh I am calling it Spring now), there was one Sunday when I was away and Lisa and Rachel were working in the nursery, so Patrick and Nicholas sat by themselves in church, up in the front where we always sit.    Lisa heard some comments about how well behaved they were and I thought, well why not?  They know how to act in church.   No one should act surprised when a kid sits through church paying attention and not causing a disruption.  That should be the norm, if we train our kids properly.

We occasionally let Daniel sit with his friends when he was a junior and senior in high school (again please translate that to the appropriate word "rarely").   Rachel as a sophomore this year has lately been sitting more with some of her friends than us and I am allowing it more, although I grumble slightly each time it happens.   Maybe I allow it more often just because I am getting older, but moreso I think it is because Lisa and I did train her well and she does act appropriately and show respect in church as a teenager.

Do I sound like a harsh or too demanding parent?  Hopefully not.  I just have some things that are very important to me as a dad and this is one of them.

So that's the tip of the week.  Sit together in church.  

Now go and enjoy the day.

Parenting happens best on a Thursday: Tip #1

A new feature at Tales from the Isle of Naboombu is my weekly "Parenting happens best on a Thursday" blogpost where I will be giving some very random parenting tips from my vast 18+ years of experience.  I understand that all my readers are now excited, as well as somewhat leery, so without further ado....

Tip #1:  Develop a continuing story with your kids that can flourish over the years.
Establish the characters.  Set the general tone.  Let it thrive over time.  Always have a cliffhanger.  The result will be a comfortable time with your kids where they will be looking forward to spending time with you to discover the continuing adventure.

Daniel listening to Dad tell a story.

For us, I started with Daniel when he was a little tot, continued on with Rachel and progressed with Nicholas and Patrick.  I reckon I will be continuing these adventures with the grandkids one day.  I fully expect my kids to share these tales with their kids. 

It always starts as follows: 

"And now, for your bedtime pleasure, the continue saga of, the adventures of, Gwendola and Gerard.  Once upon a time there was a boy named Gerard and his sister, a girl named Gwendola.  They had a kitty cat named Cheek and a puppy dog named Popalopagus.   When last we left our heroes..." and then we discover how our heroes handle their current peril.

The Wrights have followed these adventures of Gwendola and Gerard for about 16 years now, as they have saved the world numerous times from various nefarious threats, met many new and glorious friends as well as adversaries and explored both real and imaginary places across the globe.

And there is always something new.   When last we left our heroes, we discovered they had younger twin brothers who had disappeared (a surprisingly new and risky plot line, to introduce siblings).......  Maybe tonight, we'll see what happened to them!

So parents, here's a great bonding tool that will last a lifetime.   Develop your story.  Do not believe the lie that you are not creative.  Just start talking.  It doesn't have to make a whole lot of sense and there can be recurring themes over the years.  It just makes it goofier.  And a great way to connect to your kids.